Sophia Cardillo (she/her)

In My Body, 4/4/2021

Performance Art / Film / Sound mixing

As a theater artist, this pandemic has challenged me to start experimenting with film and the relationship between the camera and the actor. In this piece (a work in process) I sought to embody - not demonstrate or mime - the prompt: what does maternal exhaustion feel like in my body? I filmed myself as my toddler played in the background. Through improv, I began to discover a sort of balm to the very real and present exhaustion: consenting to being seen and witnessing the other in the midst of their own exhaustion. This vulnerable exchange helps us to feel less alone and more accompanied in the midst of living through a global pandemic.

I am currently facilitating a virtual video chat support group for mothers as part of my artist residency in motherhood. I record a prompt each week and then each mother in their own time turns the camera on and records their answer to the question - often processing and coming to new insights in real time. Each video becomes an act of vulnerability, a window into another mother’s daily life.

In the same way my own performance video, In My Body, becomes my own antidote to the isolation and weariness physically manifesting in my own body. With each sustained eye contact with my imaginary scene partner, my body becomes more energized as it literally takes up more space in my living room. I want to continue to explore this theme not only in my individual artistic practice, but hopefully in the future by hosting in-person embodiment and storytelling workshops for motherhood / parenting.

www.Patreon.com/sophiacardillo

@bidewith